You Are

You are an amazing magnificent friend
Someone I can picture
Having a life with
Having kids with
Having happiness with

You are my one
Someday you will come back to me
I wait with patience until that day arrives
Wonderfully and joyfully I will hold you in my arms

You Wouldn't If You Could/ I Won't

You wouldn't be peaceful if you could
You wouldn't be accepting if you could
You wouldn't be kind if you could


A misguided misandrist who can not stand her own offspring
The weight of your contention could crush 20 of Mt. Everest stacked upon itself
With how abrasive you are you could sand the universe into dust.
Conflict is like oxygen to you. 
Without it, you would die.
And with the fabulous qualities of being
Autocratic and audacious on top of that,
No wonder none of your marriages have worked.


You wouldn't respect him if you could
You wouldn't treat him well if you could
You wouldn't care how your actions and words destroy him,
Not even if you wanted to


You demand respect?
Try giving it!!
You demand to be listened to?
Try listening


Children learn by example
Children become how you treat them
He learned from your example to treat others like they are worthless,
He learned from your example to act just like you.
He lacks motivation because you tear him down in everything he does.
He became the opposite of what you wanted because of you.


How he turned out is no one's responsibility but your own


You wouldn't considerate if you wanted to
You wouldn't be fair if you wanted to
You wouldn't do something for yourself before making him do it for you,
Not even if you wanted to


If something needs done, DO IT!
Don't bitch and whine for someone else to get it done.
In fact don't speak at all, the venom in your words might just kill us all


I won't respect you because, watching the way you treat others, I can't
You don't and won't ever deserve it.
I won't ever trust you
Because you act like everyone else is at fault when things don't work the way you want them to
Especially when no one is at fault but you.
I won't let you make him your scapegoat.


You need him more than you even know.
You always talk of how you want him gone,
But once he is, you will miss him dearly.
Maybe not for the person he is but at least for what he was to you --
A slave


He didn't ruin your life,
It's not his fault he was born, 
You were the one that made that decision.
I won't EVER respect someone who treats their child that way

I Believe in Magic

I believe in magic because in the deepest part of me I know it exists.
There's a different magic for everyone but everyone has to have some.
Magic is a sunset
Magic is a test tube
Magic is the way someones eyes crinkle when they sincerely smile
Magic is a machine running smoothly
Magic is something entirely impossible to explain because everyone feels it

But no one knows why

Too Much

I love you too much to let you go.
I need you in my life,
You are half of my whole.

I love you too much to keep you here.
Because we both know,
That's not gonna make us happy.

Torn between happiness and loss
We stand here in the middle.
The words "let's take a break"
Like a spear through our hearts.

"One more chance" Reverberates
through heavy solemnity.
The breath of life from a condemned
heart set free.

This time in somber reality because
only that will suffice.

I love you too much to let you go.
This captivity sets me free

Natural Dramatics

Lips: The color of black cherries

Eyes: Bright emerald or deep forest green

Hair: Dark chocolate

Skin: Pure iridescent white, soft and supple

Figure: Delicate and petite

I want to be natural dramatics

Self-affliction

It's only self-affliction, that's all it is.
The deep crimson and smell of rust, a remembrance.
Abysmal scars hidden along the frame of mind.

Why put up with the pain and destruction?
Masochistic, can it be?
No, just weak and insecure.

In shadowed corners the horrible creature of lust comes out.

That's the wrong kind of attention, you know.
But it's attention all the same.
"Will you still love me in the morning?"
They never loved you in the first place!
That could never be love

Can you break the cycle and heal the gaping wounds?


*SNAP*
One little cog in the head breaks under the pressure and the pain,
Starting a dismal domino effect of realization.
It's all up to you.
Fix it..
Fix it....
Fix it!

A change of perspective.
Do you finally love yourself now?
Progression

And he just makes everything easier.
Now that's real love.

YOU!

I have finally accepted it....
Finally accepted what I knew all along.
You are not good for me!

I love you so much it hurts.
But it's obvious you are not on the same level.
You were never good for me!

Stress, pain, anger...
I may be insecure but I just wish... I just wish you
were more understanding.

UGH YOU!
I guess the blame can go on me.
But only part of it.

Oh well.
I always knew this would end.
Because it was never healthy

Somewhere

I'd like to go somewhere that's nowhere alone with you.
I'd like to be with you in an absence of time,
so we don't have to worry about forever.
I'd like to talk and laugh there in your arms.
I just want to be with you

Only Another

I don't want just another to add to my list.
I don't want just another to kiss one day
who's gone the next.
I don't want just another to tell me what they
think I want to hear.
I don't want just another to tell me lies!

I want someone who is willing to hold me.
Through the easy times and the hard.
I want someone who will be straight up with
how they feel.
Someone who won't tell me something sweet
for the express purpose of using
my emotions to their
advantage

I don't want just another.
I want only one.
Only one that will give just as much as they get.
Only one that will love me for me.
Only one that I can love with all my heart.

I want that only one.

On Strings

My heart hangs by fragile strings.
Combined, they hold up quite well
keeping my heart in place.

The you come into my life with your
pretty little scissors.
Oh how skilled you are at using those
sharpened blades.
I let you take those strings into your
dangerously appealing hands.
Even though I knew
(Oh yes I knew)
that you had those scissors right there
in your pocket.
And could pull them out whenever you
felt like it.

You have so many sets of strings wrapped
up in your stupid frikin' fingers.
I wish I could take those shiny scissors and
cut
your
fingers
OFF!!
Like you've cut away so many fragile strings before.

Sometimes

Sometimes I want to be with you
Sometimes it hurts to know you're with her
Sometimes I wish that girl was me

I want to be the one you hug
The one you kiss
The only girl on your mind.
I want to be the one you want to be with.

You're always on my mind
Wandering around like you belong in there.
Filling every thought with your presence.

Sometimes I wish you would just let me be!

Once Upon a Time

Once upon a time there was a mighty army.
A mighty army of great strength and courage.
A more impressive army the world has never seen.
They, with the mental and moral strength to
Persevere brought about many miracles.
They had trust and love in their Superiors,
Obedience without question.
They were diligent in all things commanded them.

The cry of “Never, never, never give up” filled
Their ranks.
When the path became steeper
One step at a time they did push onward.
They did strive to meet their goal.

Fear and uncertainty are replaced by our most
Powerful source of courage.
They doubt not, they fear not,
They face the Foe head on.
The promise that their Lord will not fail
Then fills their view.

Once upon a time promises something.
Great adventure, true love, sorrow, pain and overcoming.
Once upon a time promises adversity.
Once upon a time promises a happily ever after.

This mighty army is that of strong, valiant,
Virtuous young women.
Sent forth at this time to stand in righteousness
Next to our worthy priesthood holders.

We are elect ladies.
Literally royal daughters
Born to be queens.

Look into the mirror of eternity.
See yourself as your Father sees you.
Deep beauty comes through emulating Christ.
Deep beauty shines from the inside out.
Deep beauty is the only beauty that matters.
The only beauty that lasts.

We, the elect women of the Lord must
Never, never, never give up.
We go through trials and adversity
Because it is said opposition in all things.
We can choose to become stronger and
Experience joy through that great all-knowing
Teacher – Affliction
We must not only endure it but endure it well.
We can find rest in the Lord.

We, the rising generation must look with
Faith down the straight and narrow.

We will find our Happily Ever After
By reaching our Eternal Goal.

Fade to Black

Slowly the colors mix.
Once clear lines begin to soften,
Becoming unfocused. 

That's how the days pass,
Always looking forward to the future,
Never reveling in the present.
Leaving the past un-lived.

Bleeding colors going neutral.
No longer distinct.
Any lines have disappeared completely...

And then our days are gone.
Enveloped in that darkness we
Create for ourselves.

Life Is

Life is Experience

Life is a time for us to learn and grow.
After all, we are "Gods in Embryo".
We go through so much because of what
Life is but through Him we can Overcome.
Through Him we can Become.
Life is given to us by Their love.

Life Eternal

Embers

The Embers of my heart smolder softly
That Flame that once was now diminished
But the Embers remain.
The Embers of great feeling.

Somehow that flame was lit so quickly.
The fuel to the fire burned out so fast.
But the Embers remain.
The Embers of my love.

If new Fuel, better fuel, were to be added...
Would that great Flame come to life again?
Licking away the Edges
Turning them into Ash Dust.
Yet unable to eat away the Core.

Still only the Embers remain.

The intensity of Glowing heat flickering across my heart.

Double Edged Sword

A Knight with his trusted sword roams the land.
So fine, So solid, So impressive.
Accurately and gracefully the weapon and Its Master
Melt into one.
One will, One purpose, One power.
They become united, majestic and strong with the
Ability to protect or destroy.

Beautiful, gentle, and fragile, waits a bud just
About to Bloom.
Naive and trusting this fair Maiden
Lives simply knowing nothing more.

Perchance they meet and grow attached, realizing
There is much more to life than they thought before.
Her beauty shines forth in full bloom.
His face glowing with great pride in this Treasure
He has found.
Everyone can see their love.

They last in Joy for an untold time.
But, as all good things are, it was too good to be true.
What they had comes undone and flies away on
Vicious wings.
Broken hearted and torn apart they are no longer one
But two separate souls ripped to pieces.

Soon enough the Knight has found another sweet
Maid to give his heart.

The poor withered Maiden, forgotten, watches the
New happy couple and experiences even more
Pain than she had before
She is stabbed through her already
Broken and Bleeding heart with that
Same sword that once protected her.

Thrown away

This is always how it goes....
You make me happy.
You make me feel loved.
You make me feel wanted.
And then you drop me like a rock.
Is it that you get bored with me?
Is it that I'm just not what you thought you wanted?
As soon as you find something better you're gone.
As soon as you get what you wanted you're gone.

It makes me wonder if they realize...
If they realize that drastic harm brought upon me.
Upon my self-esteem.
My views of self-worth.
Everyone does it...
Boys, friends, everyone.
I guess I'm just meant to feel
Thrown away

Voices

(Writers note: All words striked through are over emphasized harshly, all words italicized are said with a false convincing and deceiving tone, all words striked through and italicized are sickly sweet with underlying harsh tones)

Gall... They're so annoying.
All of them... All those other
People. Why do they always try
To control you? Try to tell you
What to do? Is there something
Wrong with them, or is there
Something wrong with you?

Is there something wrong with
You?

You'll do what you want when
You want. At least that's what you
Try to tell yourself. But you
Know that's not true. You'll do
Anything to avoid conflict.
Anything to make others
Happy. You're WEAK!

Seriously, is there something
Wrong with you?

You think you're so high and
Mighty, but you're not. It's
Just so easy for you to make
Mistakes. You're so easy
To break!

There's gotta be something
Wrong with you!

There's so much wrong with
You, you don't even know!
 But I guess it's OK because
Somehow people STILL manage to
Love you. Remember those
Same people can't be trusted.
There's no way to Prove
Them. So you're pretty much gonna
Be hurt no matter what you
Do. You might as well
Learn to get over it. Or better
Yet, turn from them. Turn to me.
Turn to us.
Protect yourself. It'll work,
We promise. You can always 
Trust us, I know you better
Than anyone else does. We know
You better. I know
What's best for you. We know
What's best for you. I promise.

Good girl, good girl. Remember, I am
The only one you can trust.
We are the only ones you can trust.

Do you know?

Do you know you make my heart jump?
Do you know you make my mind race?
Do you know you make my stomach do flips?
You make me smile so big I fear my
Face'll stick like that.
But that's OK because they say a girl is
Always prettiest when she smiles.

Do you know I was expecting you to say you couldn't come?
Do you know I was expecting a conversation like the one that happened that night?
Do you know I lost respect for not only you but myself as well?
I tried to convince myself you were different because
I wanted you to be.
But you are just like all the others.

I want to believe in you again.
You say you want to prove to me you're worth it,
You want it...
Well start proving.
Help me regain that respect for you.
Please bring back that New Crush Feeling

Billet-doux (in french just because it looks cooler)

Cher Vous,
Mon Amour ce jour-ci j'écris à vous tout les vœux les plus profonds de mon coeur.
Je ne sais pas comment exprimer dans les mots combien je me soucie profondément .
Mais j'essaierai et vous aiderai à voir votre grande valeur et
Le sens dans ma vie.

Vous êtes l'as de coeurs et vous avez capturé le mien.
Le fait de penser à vous fait mon coeur faire quelques méchants mouvements de gymnaste,
Je ne saurais pas même comment commencer à appeler.
Vous avez attrapé mon attention
Vous avez tourné ma tête.
Vous êtes les seuls que je veux par mon côté.

Ma vie a été changée maintenant que vous y êtes entrés.
Vous me faites vouloir être quelqu'un noble de votre amour et
Je l'aime.
Vous me faites mieux.

Nous sommes la paire parfaite.
Le match parfait.
Avez-vous entendu des amis intimes ?
Bien j'ai trouvé le mien.

Avec tout nous avons été par, vous avez été mon soutien, mon ancre.
Vous m'aimez pour que je suis et n'ai jamais essayé de me changer.
Toutes mes idiosyncrasies sont attrayantes dans vos yeux.

Mon désir le plus profond consiste en ce que vous serez toujours les miens.
Je vous celui ai donnés qui est le plus précieux avant tout,
Mon vrai amour, mon coeur, mon affection éternelle et soin.
Et avant tout je vous ai donnés quelqu'un qui ira faire
Soyez toujours là.
Qui vous soutiendra dans tout que vous faites.
Je vous suis consacré de chaque façon simple.
L'amour est la seule façon de décrire le sentiment que j'ai pour vous
Mais même qui n'est pas assez.

Amour,
Moi

P.S. Saint-Valentin Heureuse :)